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I have my infusion on Thursday. Friday I got home from work and went to bed. I was there all weekend except for driving the girls to and from some of their activities. Thankfully, we had help with that too. Monday comes and I wake up early. I lie in bed repeating affirmations in my mind that I can make it to work, I have rested enough. Today I got through my shower and started normal preparations, but my body is still doped up. It just won't function quite right. So, I am taking a sick day. I can't remember if this is my first or second one this year- either way I have been very successful at powering through. That's a blessing to count for sure!
I don't know if I will lose my hair, again, it isn't a definite reaction to this chemo, but possible. If I do, I don't think I will hassle with scarves all summer. Too hot.
I am afraid I am at the point where all the best tips for making chemo more tolerable are "labor intensive" and I struggle to have the energy to keep them up.
I am struggling with a lot of things right now. But, I am trusting that this chemo is working. Of course it is, that's why I feel so rotten. (Scientifically this is not true. Many cancer patients struggle with a drug just to find it isn't effective for them.) But, I trust in The Lord, and in the words of a preisthood blessing, telling me this will be an effective chemo for me. This will stop the growth of the cancer. And, I am holding on to the faith of others that I can be one of the 2% who can be cured of stage 4 breast cancer. It will be a miracle. I do believe in miracles.
More blessings:
7. I have the best kids
8. I have sick days at work to use when I need
9. My family and friends have faith when mine is worn down
10. Warm heating pads
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