Oh joyful day

I made it. I got to the doctor. I waited and waited for the visit to start. Of course, I thought the way they treated me was a sure sign that it was bad news. (I am sure they treated me the same as always, but it seemed weird to me today)

News:  everything is about the same. My tumor markers are neither up nor down. The lump nodes are relatively similar in size. Nothing on the liver. Nothing of note on the lungs. Spots on the back about the same. I know, this doesn't sound very clear. Your immediate question is, what does that mean?  The answer, nothing. It doesn't mean I am better. It doesn't mean I am worse. It doesn't mean I am cured. It means nothing. And, nothing is better than something. Kind of like no news is good news. 

Because I've been on chemo for a while and because my onc doesn't usually give this drug for more than 6 months due to neuropathy I am getting a break. I get the next 3 weeks off to let my body rest from the treatment. 

Oh, I was so happy to hear this. So happy to be given a brief reprieve. And, a few weeks ago I was crushed at the thought of such a short break. Time changes things, doesn't it?

Oh happy day. My heart sings.